The Holiday Diaries: Los Angeles/Las Vegas May 2004 (days 9-11)
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Sunday 9 th May 2004
.Our california dreaming is over as we set off on the loong loong (and did i mention it was loooooong) drive to the vegas. Once again, it was really hot. That combined with the long drive made it a long hot day. There is, however, something completely satisfying about whizzing down the open road with your favourite songs blasting out. Even if your t shirt is sticking to your back and you are stuck to the back of your chair... And Darren won't let you put on a whole Deb cd (he is so Deb loving deficient - i am wearing him down slowly but surely. He knows the words now when songs come on) Did i mention it was a long hot drive?
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Am in a pyramid shaped room (well one side anyway) at the Luxor - there are sarcophagus' everywhere and hieroglyphics. Very walk like an egyptian. Wonder why atomic kitten never covered that song?
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Not really much to report as most of day was driving. Not a good idea to drive with windows down - bugs bitchslap you and then die on your face. Lovely...
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Monday 10th may 2004
.We seriously had t do some washing of underwear today. The hotel was far too posh to have a laundrette and i was certainly not paying dry cleaning prices ($4 per under garment!!) so we took it upon ourselves to venture into the real vegas and find a local washateria. After driving past several body shaped chalk outlines on the pavement we came upon a charming little place downtown that looked like it was gang central for the jets and the sharks who were busy practising their street dance fight move outside. We tried to inconspiciously enter. As inconspicuosly as you can when you are dragging a large suitcase full of clothes in one hand and a book called 'Faerie Wars' in the other...
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Once inside, 'twas uneventful and the washing got done as quickly as we could will the machines to spin round. There were lots of signs on the walls forbidding you to do lots of things like 'do not wash hair in machines' 'watch clothes in dryers as they may catch fire' and 'do not wash self in bathroom'. You hope people would disregard that last one a little and at least wash their hands otherwise it would be most unhygenic...
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Gamble and sleep seemed to be the main order of the day so we went out and hit the 5 cent video poker in the evening. When I pulled out of the parking space to drive back to the Luxor, i shot forward thinking it would be quicker just to go straight ahead. it wasn't - there were huge concrete blocks to stop you going that way and there was some hefty bumper banging before i slammed on the brakes, wedging the blocks between the car wheels. YIKES! I had to drive very slowly to get the back wheels over, only to realise there was no way out that way so had to drive back over them to get out on the original side, scraping the undercarriage all the way. BLOODY HELL!!!!!!
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Tuesday 11th May 2004
.Why oh why would you pay good money to see a show and then just chat very loudly all the way through to your equally rude friends?? There are some places i fell that you should be quiet - like the queue for the coffee this morning. This terribly rude british woman was quite vocal about the fact that you just couldn't order a 'regular' coffee (even though the price board clearly said ' house coffee') "Oh bloody nora, i just want a black coffee not a flaming caramel merrypocahontiati latte - its just perfectly atrocious" I was scared to speak when i got to the counter in case people associated me with her so i had to put on a dreadful american accent which in retrospect, was probably more offensive to people than being linked with the harpy behind me.
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Despite the noisy frat bro's, the legends in concert show was quite good. And we got to sit with nice people. Even though the old guy was convince that we were on the town to find some nice girls. Sweet. its been a long time since anyone assumed i was heterosexual. LAst time we were in vegas in nov 2002, a cigar chomping guy kept saying charming things to us like' i'll take you to grab some titties and slap some dollars on a hookers ass'. I didn't know what to say except 'how terribly bill clinton of you...' I have never moved so fast after a show before.
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The legends show was impersonators of people like Tom Jones, the Beatles and Elvis. Even though it was obvious that the performers weren't the actual stars, but older less attractive (if fine sounding) substitutes, this fact seemed to escape several otherwise perfectly sane middle aged women. One group of ladies (all dressed in pink) were screaming like teenagers and the old crone next to me was clapping her hands like a demented seal. Crazy! Several cream pies were laid in ladies knickers that night... (TOO GROSS???)
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The aretha soundalike was too concerned about her vocal acrobatics and held every night for about two minutes. In the end you just wanted to shout 'shut up and get on with it' But then she sang respect and everyone sang along. R-E-S-P-E-C-T - find out what it means to me - but then everyone got confused and sort of mumbled R-E-S-P-E-C-T take me some TCP - or found on my new cd - but then it was back to full volume for 'sock it to me' etc. Phew...
Posted by Paul 8:08 am
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